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Giving and Getting Unconditional Love

Giving and Getting Unconditional Love

Unconditional love comes from a place that most people don’t understand.  This is a love that cannot be expressed in words and it creates a place that can sometimes lead to unhealthy situations.

When You Love Someone Unconditionally

To love someone unconditionally means that you love them and there are no limits or bounds to your love.  This means you can love them freely and offer everything in your heart to them without expecting them to give you something back.  What is important about unconditional love is that most people want to attach strings, and this can make things imbalanced.

When you think of unconditional love, you think about a love between a parent and a child.  This type of love is unconditional and there are no strings attached.  This can also come in the form of romantic love with your partner.  You can give a certain amount of love and not expect anything in return.

You might wonder why you give love so much and you never get anything in return, or you might worry about what you are getting, and this is not what unconditional love is.

This kind of love is conditional love and is only there based on the conditions of the relationship and things being done for you.  This is more like a love debt and it makes people unhappy.

You can offer unconditional love to people even when they are hard to deal with and you can do this with boundaries.

You do this by showing support but not giving them everything and you will put them in their place when they are disrespectful to you.

Is Unconditional Love Okay?

Unconditional love can be healthy, and you can really love someone but you need to have boundaries.  You have to have love and kindness in any relationship, and you need to have boundaries.  These boundaries might be distracting and make the other person want to cut you off, but without them, it will cause pain and hurt.

You are not able to be indebted to a person because that is not what love is.  They don’t owe you anything except kindness and respect and you need to walk away from people that cannot show you this.

If you love without boundaries, you are setting yourself up for abuse or for heartbreak.  Every relationship has to have expectations and boundaries.

Sometimes we ignore these boundaries and we call it unconditional love, but this is really codependent love.  This means you excuse behavior that is not okay, and you have an unbalanced relationship and you can never truly connect with them.

Another way to have unconditional love is to believe that you have more to offer than a normal relationship.  This means that you can offer love and not expect something in return but not that you can love them and let them hurt you.

Ny relationship that does not have kindness or respect will cause one person to go through something while the other partner thinks their actions are oaky.  This will cause you to disrespect yourself and will cloud your judgement and take away your boundaries.

When you offer unconditional love, you do that by not meaning forever, exactly, but by meaning forever as long as you are being treated respectfully.

Wholehearted Love

To love someone with your whole heart means that you are able to be vulnerable and love someone and offer your whole heart.  This means you do it because you want to feel good and you want to have a good relationship.  How do you know the difference between loving with your whole heart and unconditionally?

When you love someone through their hard times and their mistakes, this means that there are no longer any bounds and you love unconditionally.  If someone has hurt you, you are willing to repair it and fix it.  This is good for you to set limits so that you have a good well-being.  DO not let respect pass you up and do not let people be around you without boundaries and change when they are mistreating you.

Loving someone through problems can be a good experience.  This means the relationship is lasting and will be stronger.  This can help you to have stronger connections and offer your love for someone by moving forward so everyone wins.

When you know you love someone with your whole heart, you are willing to see the challenges and to learn to grow.  There is no score for each one because you are on the same team.

You will know that the love is not wholehearted when there are debts, strings and boundaries that are not being met.  You will need to demand kindness and respect.

Here are some ways to love with your whole heart:

  • Pay attention when they give you love and how you receive it. Do you push yourself to give love just for because you want to?
  • Learn to value the differences.
  • Be honest and open. Let people know what you want and expect.
  • Be a good listener and not just a hearer.
  • Don’t let people control you and if they do stop it immediately.

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